Speak Softly, Carry a Big Heart

Strong and silent. Always has been, or for as I long as I’ve known him. Standing. Waiting. Listening. Quietly, for the most part.

His silence bothers me. I talk and I laugh, because I must talk, I must laugh. How does he remain so still, so quiet? I want the secret. He shrugs and smiles. So, I tease him. He doesn’t deserve it, but I can’t help myself. If I can’t be silent, then he must talk, he must laugh. And when he submits a few words, or a low chuckle, it is a hollow victory. Never sure if they were gifts or sacrifices.

Because when they’re true. When they’re birthed from volition, his laughter vibrates the air around him. His conversation rolls like the deep ocean. A wonder to witness. A force of nature.

Contained. Standing. Waiting. Listening. Quietly, for the most part

jemini jolie on tumblr

 

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I know:

that I don’t make sense. that I’m a mess. that I’m needy. that I cling too tightly. that I call too much. that I ask too much. that folk need time. that people need space. that I’m a grown woman. that things will get better. that time heals all wounds. that this too shall pass.

I wish:

upon a star. there were answers. there was time. there was trust. loneliness weighed less. i weighed less. the path were clear. to be found. to go home.

I pray:

for you. for me. for grace. for peace. for love. for guidance. forever.

jemini jolie on tumblr

 

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